Trevor the Overlander: A Parody
by BLURPENSKIRF.boom
Summary: My third story written, this is a hopefully successful parody of the Underland Chronicles! : Rated K because... oh, who cares?
1. Chapter 1

**Get ready to read a funny parody for Gregor the Overlander, one of my favorite books of all time! That's basically all I have to say about this, really.  
>Boom.<strong>

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><p>PART I: The call<br>_

Trevor leaned forward to lean his forehead against the glass door and fell on his face. He looked up to see that the door was already open. Great. Trevor felt the sudden urge to let out an emergency caveman scream, the kind that is reserved for times like when you run out of meat and are too lazy to go kill something. "Ergh." That "Ergh," reminded him of an earlier time that day when he had done something similar...

_Trevor banged his forehead against the glass sliding door and muttered, "Ugh." He then opened it to let some fresh air inside..._

"Oh," said Trevor as he remembered how the door had suddenly opened, and then connected that to the dog that he had seen eating out of the trash can and was too lazy to do something about it. Trevor went to the freezer and grabbed an ice cube. He then went to the dog and threw the cube at it, shouting, "GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!"  
>The dog ran towards the door (The same one that was just closed) and ran into it, falling backwards with a yip. <em>That dumb door,<em> thought Trevor as he opened it kicked the dog outside where it tipped over a garbage can and ran away laughing.  
>A dark shape emerged from the garbage can. Shadows. He never really got used to them. Especially the one that followed him around.<br>Today the street was devoid of its usual kids running around, stabbing each other with knives, and laughing. No, today the only movement came from-  
>"Is that a <em>tumbleweed?<em> Since when did we get tumbleweeds?" said Trevor to nobody in particular. Well, anyways, today everyone from ages 1-16 on his block had been on a bus to go to Camp Fun-Fun-Shine. Trevor and his sister, High-Heels (Yes, that is her real name. She just looks so adorable in high-heels.), were the only ones left behind. Trevor recalled the discussion he had had with his mother the other day.

_"But mom..."  
>"I know how much you want to go, but you have to remember, I have to make your life as miserable as possible. You know I love you."<br>"I know."  
>"Now come give mummy a hug."<em>

Trevor sighed. He knew his mother only wanted to protect him, especially after his dad had dissapeared when he went down to the laundry room for band practice with his group. Why they chose the laundry room, Trevor would never know. Trevor's dad, whom we shall now call "Frank", played the tuba. Trevor also played the Tuba, and he had been improving, too. In fact, last night Trevor had only woken up about half of the apartment complex! Trevor played sports, too. Well, _a _sport. He played golf!  
>"Tac-o!" Trevor heard High-Heels call out from her crib. She always called him that. Most people thought it was as close as she could get to "Tractor," which was as close as she could mentally get to "Trevor." He plucked her out of the crib and then went to go make her a bottle of cold milk. Trevor got himself a bottle of pomegranite juice and then walked into the living room.<br>_Ding-dong!  
><em>"Lucy!" shouted Trevor's mentally ill grandmother, "Could you get that! And thank you for fixing the doorbell! I know you haven't had any time for that lately." Trevor always wondered who the heck Lucy was. If he found out, he wanted to punch her and tell her to get out of his grandma's head.  
>Trevor went to the door and opened it, where thier elderly neighbor, Mrs. Corbetti, was standing.<br>"Oh, why hello, dear, is that for me?" And then she took the pomegranate juice and guzzled it down like she had been stuffed in an oven (which she propably had, with the angry mob of customers she always had at her doorstep). Mrs. Corbetti then excused herself to he bathroom on account of the juice, while Trevor sat down on their rat-skin couch.  
>Suddenly, the phone started ringing. Trevor wondered if it was his mother, and if not, who else it could be.<br>"Hello?"  
>"Trevor..."<br>"Hello? Who is this?"  
>"Come to the laundry room, Trevor... bring the phone." Trevor walked down the stairs, really freaked out.<br>"O.K. I'm here. What do you want?"  
>"Look in the grate, Trevor..."<br>"Dad? Is that you?"  
>"Uuuuuhhhhhh... No."<br>"Oh, Okay. Now I'm at the grate. what now?"  
>*silence*<br>"Hello?"  
>*silence*<br>"Hello? Are you there? Hhhhheeeeeellllllloooooo!"  
>*silence*<br>"HEY! WHERE DID YOU-"  
>"BOO!"<br>"WHOA!" Trevor was startled so much that he fell forward, still holding High-Heels, into the black, laundry-scented, hole.

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><p><strong>I hope you enjoyed that first chapter, and I hope you laughed at it, too. Mah parents always said I was funny.<br>And please, please, please, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE review on my other story! I can't write the second chapter without at least 10 reviews! It's been at least 3 months since I posted it, and I still only have 1 review (thank you, Brahian!). :(**

**Boom.**


	2. Chapter 2

**narrator: Well here we are again. It's always SUCH a pleasure! LOL(portal 2 joke). Time for the second chapter of the funniest parody of the Underland Chronicles in all of New York!  
>ME: but I live in Florida...<br>narrator: nobody cares where you live! Now continue writing the funny stuff, slave author #379!  
>ME: fine... :.(... Oh, yeah! Boom. :.(...<strong>

**Disclaimer: Well, I've become the disclaimer-hating zombie that the rest of you have. Now my FanFiction author-ness is complete! MWAH-HA-HA-HA-HA! *gets whacked on head with briefcase* OUCH! I own no references to the Underland Chronicles...**

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><p>Chapter 2<br>_

"YAAAHHHOOO!" screamed Trevor as he fell through air, not really caring that his little sister was right below him, screaming her lungs out for all it was worth. In fact, he was planning on using High-Heels as a cushion when he landed. High-Heels was very cooshy. And he should know. Trevor had always dreamed of flying, but it was the _landing_ that scared him.  
>"THIS IS THE BEST THING EVE- OOF!" Trevor had landed. <em>Well, THAT was short.<em> Then he decided to notice the lack cushioning underneath him, as well as the lack of comfort on his bum-bums.  
>"HIGH-HEELS! WHERE ARE YOU!" Trevor shouted.<br>"Ouch."  
>Trevor looked next to him. "Oh."<br>High-Heels crawled away and into a crevasse in the wall, and it took Trevor a few minutes to realize that she wasn't there any more. _I wonder if I'm dreaming, _Tevor wondered, _I hope not. This is the most exciting thing that has has happened to me so far this summer.  
><em>Trevor got up and walked to the crack in the wall where the light was poking through. He pushed himself through, and then got lodged about three-quarters of the way there.  
>"I KNEW I should've stopped eating those Super-Sugar Chocalate Cocoa Crunchers and straight pig fat for breakfast." Trevor grumbled as he sucked in his gut for ten excrutiatingly painfull (and slow-going) minutes pushing himself through the crevice.<br>Trevor finally popped through the wall to the other side and fell flat on the ground for the third time that day, and, not wanting to have to stand up and walk to _wherever _he was going, wished he was on a Seg-Way. And so, Trevor got up and was suddenly looking into the face of the largest dung beetle he had ever seen. It was about the size of his fist. He then looked _higher _up and into the face of an even _larger _dung beetle! Now, his apartment complex had some scary-sized bugs. Mrs. Corbetti had once claimed to have seen a bug the size of her hairbrush. No one doubted her. In fact, some of them bragged that we _owned_ bigger bugs! But this was just a little bit over the top.  
>The big bug appeared to be sitting on it's hind legs, just like a dog. It towered over Trevor in this position, untill it fell forward on it's front legs, causing Trevor to scoot his back against the wall. High-Heels was off in the distance, jumping on a big rock, her high-heels making <em>crunch<em>ing sounds and leaving oozing holes on it. Strange.  
>"Smells what so good, smells what?" inquired a voice coming from the cockroach. Trevor thought for a moment.<br>"Dung beetles... Oh! High-Heels pooped. And stop talking like that. You sound like Yoda." Said Trevor.  
>"O.K. Dinner!" hissed the beetle, and suddenly five big rocks stood up and skittered over to the first dung beetle.<br>"Melvin?" said one of them and looked at the rock with High-Heels' indents on it, and the ooze coming out of them, "Melvin! Dinner! Oh well, he'll wake up."  
>"Umm, yeah!" Agreed Trevor nervously, "He'll wake up."<br>"You are from the Overland, right?" asked Beetle #1.  
>"Overland?" Trevor.<br>"Overland? Above? Topside?" Beetle#2.  
>"Oh. Where am I now?" Trevor.<br>"You are in the Underland!" Beetle #1.  
>"What's <em>that<em>?" Trevor.  
>"Ignorance... Underland. Center of the Earth. The Middle." Beetle #2.<br>"Oh." Trevor.  
>One of them seemed to remember something and said "Rats... should we leave them here?"<br>"Whoa, whoa, whoa...," said Trevor, "I just went through the trouble of falling down here and bringing you dinner, and you're just going to dump me here? I don't think so." And he climbed onto the back of the first beetle. It wasn't a Seg-Way, but it was as close as he was probably going to get.  
>"Ow..." said the beetle.<br>"We will take you to the Underlanders. They will exchange for balls of dung." Beetle #2 said. Trevor nearly lost his- wait, he hadn't had lunch yet. High-Heels, though... Well, Trevor hoped they had air fresheners in the Underland.  
>"WHHEEEEEEE!" shouted the two of them as they rode on the beetles as he went through twists and turns, went up a steep hill and zoomed down the other side, and even did a loop-de-loop.<br>Suddenly, Trevor started to hear the familiar roar of a crowd. There was a strange veil of something soft and leathery, Trevor spit a moth, and suddenly they were in a room with unexpected light that made Trevor recoil.  
>"Someone warn me before you flip that switch!" Trevor shouted. There was a big gasp and suddenly the roar was quiet, comfirming that it was, in fact, a crowd. Trevor looked around.<br>"I'm in a stadium! Hey, wait a minute... I had better not be in the Hunger Games! I have better plans then death at the moment!" He looked up and saw that there were about a dozen bats circling in the air. He wondered if they would feed him to the bats. The bats probably wouldn't take anyways. No worries.  
>Something dropped from one of the bats. It fell to the ground and bounced up again.<br>Trevor gasped. "DONUT! I call dibs!" he and High-Heels jumped off the beetle and followed the trail of the airborne pastry. Then Trevor tripped.  
>"HEY! No fair!" As High-Heels chased the donut, a big, golden bat swooped into view and headed for her.<br>"HIGH-HEELS! GET THE DONUT!" High-Heels ran faster, but the bat did a loop, and a girl jumped off the back of the bat during the loop and performed a triple backflip, landing perfectly in front of High-Heels. The girl extended her arm and caught the donut as it landed. That could only have been three things. Remarkable timing, extreme luck, or a girl that wanted that donut just as bad as they did. Trevor could tell it wasn't luck, and if she had wanted that donut that badly, she would've eaten it by now.

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><p><strong>FINALLY! Finished! I hope you enjoyed it, please review, and please ALSO review on my other story, Random FanFiction Lines! Untill next time!<strong>

**Boom.**


	3. Chapter 3

**~HELLO! I have taken up the art of the squiggly ~ sign. And I love it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~YAY!**** There will be an exceeding amount of The Hunger Games references in this chapter and others following. And those of you that don't get why I chose the Hunger Games either don't know what it is (GASP!), or don't know their authors. And, unfortunately, every time I save this document, it gets rid of the spaces I put in front of each paragraph, so you'll just have to go with it not in paragraph form. :(**

**~Boom.**

**DISCLAIMER: ~I just had a yard sale, so I'm not very sure what I own anymore.**

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><p>Chapter 3<br>_

The girl Trevor was looking at reminded him of those jellyfish he had seen at the zoo. Or was it the park? Well, either way, it was something that started with A. Her skin was pale like one of those vampires from Twilight, except without the sparkles. Her hair was silver.  
>"Why is your hair silver?" Trevor asked.<br>"Oh, we spray-paint it!" She said.  
>"Oh, you mean like the people from the Capitol?"<br>"What?"  
>"Nevermind."<br>And you could see her veins, which made Trevor _really _lucky he hadn't had lunch yet. High-Heels didn't care what the girl looked like, and probably didn't even acknowledge that she was there. She only wanted that donut.  
>"Do-nut!" She squealed as she reached for it. The girl didn't notice High-Heels as she stared at Trevor, trying to intimidate him. That is, not until High-Heels ran into her with her shoulder like a football lineback or whatever they're called. The girl fell over as High-Heels snatched the donut from her hand.<br>"Ha! Looks like my baby sister is stronger than you!"  
>"You know what? OFF WITH HIS HEAD!" she screamed, making Trevor realize that she was a form of sadistic, psychotic royalty.<br>"No, no, no, wait! Just kidding! Psych! HA HA! I'm a joker!" Trevor said frantically.  
>"Oh. O.K.! Called, what you are?" Inquired the girl, or at least Trevor <em>thought<em> she was inquiring.  
>"First, cut that Yoda thing out! It's driving me mad! Second, my name is Trevor, and this is High-Heels. We call her that because of this scientist my mom likes. What's your name?"<br>"I am queen Lucy," she said, comfirming that she was royaly.  
>Something clicked in Trevor's mind, and he slapped Lucy in the face, screaming, "GET OUT OF MY GRAMMY'S HEAD!" And then everything was back to normal. *Wink*<br>"Trevor, you and High-Heels need to take a bath," stated Lucy.  
>"Well, excuse me if I don't take personal hygene seriously!"<br>"No, I mean you smell like Super-Sugar Chocolate Cocoa Crunchers. And rats love sugar."  
>"Oh," said Trevor. He saw Lucy turn towards the beetles and start discussing a price with them.<br>"5 dollars for the fat, whiny one and 50 for the cute one?" said a beetle.  
>"Hey..." whined Trevor<br>Lucy considered it, and then said, "25 for her and it's a deal."  
>"Fine." And then the dung beetles trotted off, talking about a trip to DisneyWorld.<br>Suddenly, an old, pale, gray-haired man walked up to Trevor and High-Heels.  
>"OHMIGODOHMIGODOHMIGOD! ARE YOU DUMBLEDORE!" Trevor screamed in the man's face.<br>"No, I am not Dumbledore. But I know who you are."  
>"Well then, who am I, Mr. know-it-all?" Said Trevor, who I am really beginning to dislike.<br>"You must be Trevor the Overland, from New York City," The old man replied, and then turned to face your screen and reach towards you, effectively breaking the Forth Wall.


	4. Chapter 4

**This is the fourth chapter in my Trevor the Overlander parody. Yes, I am planning on parodying the entire series unless something goes wrong. And I am VERY determined to finish this first book. The only thing that could stop me from doing that is if I die. And don't worry, if I die, I will notify all of you when I get to Heaven. I'm sure they have computers there. And I also want to say that I had this idea for an actual book that I could write when I start my carreer as an author. It's called "The Boy and His Raptor." It's basically about a boy who befriends a raptor after this earthquake sets loose dinosaurs that had been living underneath our feet and we didn't know it, an they both are in the middle of this cross-species war and they have no idea which side to choose. But I'm kind of scared that people will think I stole the underground dinosaurs idea from Ice Age 3. Even if that passed, though, who would want to read a book written by a twelve-year-old? Sometimes I feel as though my talent in words are only appreciated here. So (bear with me here), should I just put it on FictionPress (the sister site to FanFiction) and then re-write it when I get older, write it on FictionPress and leave it there, or just wait 'till I get older to write it? Honest opinion please! Now, to the story. Sorry for the long A/N, I just had so much to say and was afraid that if I split it up and saved half of it for the bottom, I'd forget it.**

**Boom.**

**DISCLAIMER: I really don't have room for this... I OWN NOTHING THAT HAS TO DO WITH THE UNDERLAND CHRONICLES. WHOA. THIS VOICE IS SO COOL. EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE! HUMANS ARE ONLY SUPERIOR FOR ONE THING: THEY ARE BETTER AT DIEING.**

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><p>Chapter 4<br>_

"Oh my god. Oh my god! You are wise and all-knowing" exclaimed Trevor as he started thinking about New York City, and his house, and his mother, and- Oops! Trevor had forgotten to call his mother before he told her he was going to go on a dangerous, life-threatening journey! Oh well, she would have said yes anyways.  
>"What's your name, anyways?" Trevor said, turning to the old man.<br>"I am called Sickus," he replied through a coughing fit.  
>"Lovely. Can I go home now?"<br>"No."  
>"So now this is a hostage situation, huh?"<br>"No, I didn't say th-"  
>"Do you <em>want<em> me to call 911?" And that was almost the end of this parody, until Trevor realized he had zero bars, and no 4G connection, either. And even if he did, how were the cops supposed to help him?  
><em>"Oh, down the third air gate in the fourth laundry room to the right."<em>  
><em>"Thanks, kid. Now how do I get to where you are?"<em>  
><em>"Uhhhmm... I kind of forgot."<em>  
><em>"Thanks, kid... "<br>_Exactly. Well, looks like he'll just have to drag himself and High-Heels back home himself. Not an easy task. He should get started when he had some energy left in him.  
>"Well, see you guys when I have another chance to come down here... heh heh." And Trevor started towards the entrance.<br>"Okay! See you later, when you decide to come back and fulfill your prophecy!" said Lucy happily.  
>"Moron... Bats! Stop them!" screamed Sickus. He didn't really need to say that, though, because about half-way to the exit Trevor collapsed and put High-Heels down, catching his breath.<br>"Wait! Time out! I just gotta.. catch my breath... then we can... resume!" The other bats started laughing, and High-Heels did, too.  
>"Thank you for the sisterly support," Trevor grumbled. "Alrigh, alright! I give up!" He shouted out loud this time. Trevor started walking toward Lucy and Sickus. On the way there, he picked up a rock and threw it behind him, shouting "Fetch!" All the bats rushed to get the rock at once, colliding into each other.<br>"I disrespect you from now on." said Lucy.  
>"Okee-Dokie." replied Trevor. Lucy took off on her bat and headed away.<br>"Follow me to the palace." said Sickus.  
>"What do we do there?"<br>"Well, you can take a bath, and then maybe we can watch a movie in the entertainment room."  
>"Really? And I thought you guys were underdeveloped! Whatcha got?"<br>"Well, there's Tron, Jurassic Park, and a movie called JAWS just came out...  
>"Wait, do you mean the <em>classic <em>Tron?"  
>"Well, there's only one."<br>"You guys really _are _culturally underdeveloped."  
>"What?"<br>"Nothing..." said Trevor hurriedly, and then, to change the subject, "Have you ever been to the Overland?"  
>"No, visiting there is like finding a ray gun. Very, very, rare."<br>"Hold on, you've found a ray gun!"  
>"Well, a man who arrived here in a big, blue box gave it to us. He said it was a spare. He called it... What was it... a Sonic Screwdriver! That was it!"<br>"Uuuummmm... Okay..." said Trevor, deciding not to say anything on the subject.  
>"So, no. The Overlanders are the ones who visit us often."<br>"Where are they now?"  
>"They are not here anymore. The Underland is not a nice place for Overlanders."<br>"You mean you ate them? I do that sometimes. Of course, I don't tell anybody, because that would be considered cannibalistic. You know what goes the best with butter? It's the-"  
>"NO! Er... no, we do not eat them, and we do not want to or ever will want to. That is disgusting." said Sickus hurriedly.<br>"Oh... You heard nothing!"  
>"Okay... Oh, and just to let you know, every creature in the Underland now knows you're here."<br>"And that would include?"  
>"The Spiders, the Rats, the Dung Beetles, the Bats, the Squid, the Mice, the Ants, the Frogs, the Phirahnas, and all the rest."<br>"Oh. Why did you do that?"  
>"Do what?"<br>"Capitalize the first letters of all the names."  
>"Wha- Why- How do you hear that?"<br>"Dunno. Oh, and you misspelled pirhana, too."  
>"Mispronounced, you mean?"<br>"No, you pronounced it just fine. You just misspelled it, is all. Don't worry, it happens." Sickus just stood there and stared at Trevor dumbfoundedly.  
>Then, to change the subject, he said, "Oh, look, we're here!" and hurriedly stepped through a green smoke screen.<br>"I would have prefered purple, but oh well..." stated Trevor as he carried his (now mentally traumatized for about two more hours from he and Sickus' conversation) little sister through the green (I wanted purple...) smoke screen.

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><p><strong>And that's that! Sorry about the wait, I'm busy working on the first chapter of a new idea for a chain of stories a friend of mine and me had. It's not out yet, but with this chapter out of the way, I'l have time to write the rest of the chapter and post it without keeping this story waiting too long. It's called "The Machine: Prolougue" in case you would find it interesting. The prolougue story will be on FictionPress, though, but all the other stories (except specials) will be on FanFiction. The Prolougue will explain. Look it up though, I'm really hoping this one will be a success! Review, please, and as always:<strong>

**Boom.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Greetings, Earthlings, and welcome to the fifth chapter in my very highly acclaimed (by my poodle) Underland Chronicles parody! And I am _so so so _sorry about the long wait! It's just that my computer hard-drive got fried, and we finally got our anti-virus back yesterday! Cheer, cheer! So, thank you, thank you, for your extraordinary patience, and on with the show! Oh, and I just finished the Hunger Games series three weeks ago! Ending is a shocker!**

**Boom.**

**DISCLAIMER: Wô yôngyôu shé mé, shì bùshì wô. (The first person to translate that in the comments will get a free virtual cookie!)**

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><p>Chapter 5<br>_

When Trevor popped through the other side of the green smoke, he gasped in shock. What was sitting in front of him was actually quite different than what he had expected. Trevor had thought of his neighborhood when he heard there was a city down in this place. He had thought of Flinstone-like houses and lots of old things. Really old things. Definitely his neighborhood. But the place standing before him was... ugly. It was definately modern, though, the styles in which the city was built. The buildings and houses all looked like they had been brought in from the hood, except for the palace. And even _that _wasn't looking too good. It wasn't made of bricks, of course, but the stone it was carved from was crumbly, and everything looked like it was going to topple over on Trevor.  
>"well, this is... Originally familiar," said Trevor, not knowing himself what that meant.<br>"A lot of the Overlanders that come down here say that, so it must be a good thing!" said Sickus.  
>"Yeah... Sure..." and then there were the people! Everywhere Trevor looked, there were people in hoodies, or baseball caps turned backwards. Some of them even had guns! He never found out where the guns came from. Trevor then realized what he had meant by "originally familiar."<br>"Sooo... Where did you get the styles of your city from?"  
>"From a place one of the entrances to the underland let out to."<br>"Did that place have a strange smell?"  
>"Yes. Why?"<br>"Just asking." _Great.  
><em>"You shall come and dine with us at the palace. There is a great view there!"  
>"You're doing it again, Gandalf. And I really have to get home right- HOLY HAPPY COWS WHERE DID THE MOON GO!"<br>"We're underground."  
>"Oh. That's right."<br>As they walked, all the gangstas looked at High-Heels and said "peace, man", or "yo", and High-Heels just stuck her fingers up in the "peace" motion. V  
>They aproached the palace and two guards said, "Halt! You shall not pass!"<br>"They really take a lot after you, Gandalf," said Trevor.  
>"Tell me why I decided to buy you again," And then Trevor burped.<br>"I dunno. Say, how did I land safely after that fall?"  
>"Wind blowing upward. Although I'm not so sure how it managed to spare you," Sickus said, and then poked Trevor's gut.<br>"This is going to be a long visit, but as long as you guys have Twinkies, I won't do something crazy like try to escape through the bathtub or anything like that."  
>"What?"<br>"Nothing."  
>"Oh, okay," and then Trevor noticed the lack of a door and asked, "How are we going to get in?"<br>"By going up. And since you can't fly up on a bat, you will have to use the elevator."  
>"There's an actual, working elevator in this place?"<br>"We have people up at the top pulling... Oh god." It then took almost an hour to get the message up to the people at the ropes to go find reinforcements, adding a few zeros to the maximum weight capacity. Even with the reinforcements at the top of the thing, the ride was slow and rickety, with the platform even dropping a few feet sometimes. When they got to the top, Trevor saw eight muscled soldiers on one rope, and eight more on the other. They collapsed on the floor with sweat dripping down their flushed faces when Trevor stepped off, followed by Sickus. There were three under- landers standing in spot center of the room they were let out in.  
>"Yo, homeboy Sickus," said one of them.<br>"Peace," replied Sickus.  
>"Yo, homie," said one of them as Trevor passed by them. <em>Did he just call me homie! <em>Trevor felt loved. He didn't have any friends, unless he counted that creepy kid at school that stalked him as a friend. He was beginning to like it here. And after his dad went missing, even the stalker thought he was pathetic. Trevor didn't care. As long as he had Twinkies here.  
>A woman that actually looked normal walked up to the group and said, "I am Dull-set. They," she indicated to the two hippie guards that suddenly appeared on either side of her, "are Marrieth and Perdisco. I will lead you to the bath."<br>And she did. She led them through twists and turns and drops and yet anoter Loop-da-Loop.  
>"So, where are the Twinkies?" Trevor asked, feeling as though he were lost.<br>"We don't have any." There was a long pause as Trevor comprehended this. A REALLY long pause.  
>"Soooo... Where did you say the the exit was again?"<br>"You can only get out through the elevator or by using a bat," replied Perdisco. Well, Trevor didn't have a bat, and he knew that the guys lifting the elevator wouldn't lower him down again without some kind of really special permission from someone. Well, looks like he was going to have to find another way out.  
>They got to the bathroom and Trevor stepped inside the boys' bathroom, then stepped back out again, blushing. He then stepped into the boys' bathroom to his right. It was empty.<br>"We will leave you alone now to take your bath, which is conveniently located above the WaterWay to make it easier for you to escape. Not that you would, because we all know that you are a model citizen and wouldn't do a thing like that," said Marrieth.  
>"Yeah, whatever," said Trevor and he shut the door on any further words and got into the bath. Trevor was sitting there when he recalled the words that Marrieth had told him only fifteen seconds ago that he somehow managed to forget. There was water under this! The water from the tub must be drained out into it! And if the water could get, maybe he could to- wait a minute! That was rediculous! How was he suppose to fit through that tiny drain! No, he'll just see where the water goes after that, and follow it from there. Now, if water could get in and out of... Oh, I give up!<p>

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><p><strong>And that's that! That was exhausting! That chapter in the book was long, and it didn't give me much material, but I really hope you're happy with the result! And I am giving a free virtual cookie to pocketnova for favoriting my story, and being the only one that has so far. ( ) It's a plain cookie. :). And I will ALSO favorite one of isher stories as well. I will also do that to everybody else who favorites my story, for the rest of eternity! (Or until I die.) I hope you enjoyed it, and I can't wait to get started on the next one!**

**Boom. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello, all, and welcome! It feels good to be back after that long (unnentiontional) break! Which definately wasn't because I was too lazy to type! *wink* *wink* This time I'm going to try and amp it up, as I am feeling unnaturally refreshed today. I hope that doesn't go away for a while. And I know that you all just want to read the story so here you go!**

**DISCLAIMER: I _said_, so here you go. That means no disclaimers.**

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><p>Chapter 6<br>_

Trevor was scrubbing himself down with a lufa sponge, still wondering how people that lived so far underground managed to obtain all these objects. That was just one of life's great mysteries, like why the sky is blue, or why this place didn't have any Twinkies. As Trevor dried himself with a towel, noticed that the towel was sticking to him. He ripped it off, causing it to burn like crazy.  
>"AAAAUUUGGGHHH!" he tried to say, but it came out like "AAAUUURRGGRHHGGGG! IT BURNS! AAUUUAUAUAUAUHHHGGRRGRGGGGG!" Marrieth ran in instantly in and helped him calm down and get his clothes on.<br>"Thanks," Trevor said.  
>"Hey, what are these clothes made out of anyways?"<br>"They are made of spider silk. The same stuff the towel was made of." Marrieth replied. Trevor instantly grew pale.  
>"Wh-Wh-What?" Trevor pulled on the shirt. It wouldn't budge. <em>Well, that's just perfect.<br>_"Say, how do you get these things off without tearing your skin off?" he asked.  
>"You don't."<br>"But how do you wash yourselves?"  
>"You don't."<br>"... Then whydo you have a bathroom?"  
>"Stop asking questions."<br>"'Kay," they stood outside, waiting, until Dull-Set came out with High-Heels. It looked like she was wearing the same stuff he was, except she had a diaper on.  
>"YOU PUT A SPIDER SILK DIAPER ON HER!" yelled Trevor, not wanting to be around when she had to be changed.<br>"Yes. What's wrong with that?"  
><em>"Do you plan on changing it?" <em>he seethed.  
>"...no-"<br>"THEN THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT! YOU PUT IT ON HER, SO YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT OFF, SINCE I'M NOT DOING IT! AND IF YOU DON'T PLAN ON DOING IT, THEN WE ALL DIE AS SOON AS IT PENETRATES OUR NOSES!" he stood there, breathing heavily, and calmed down. After a while, Trevor noticed the shocked faces on the underlanders around him, and said through gritted teeth, _"That, is what's wrong with it."_  
>Dull-Set, shaking, gave Trevor one of those things that you see parents wearing that wraps around the back and has a pouch in front where you put the baby. Trevor was fully calmed down by now, and he put it on and slipped High-Heels in it.<br>"Wait, what is this made of?"  
>"Sp- Spider S-S-S-Silk." The force of the explosion was enough to wipe all of their memories of the past half hour, and when they all got up, they looked at the blast marks on the wall, shrugged, found the baby carrier in the corner and it had lost it's stickyness, and they walked onwards.<br>"Where are we going?" asked Trevor.  
>"We are headed to the High Hall," answered Marrieth.<br>"Why did you call it the High Hall if you're about sixteen hundred miles underground?"  
>"I thought I told you to stop asking questions." Marrieth was getting irritated.<br>"Okay." They walked onward, and then the hallway let off into a big balcony with no roof.  
>"Why is there no roof?"<br>"STOP ASKING QUESTIONS!"  
>"It is okay, Marrieth. I will answer his question." This came from Sickus, who was standing at the other side of the room with an old woman in a wheelchair. "The High Hall is used for entertainment, and the lack of a roof is for the bats to fly in."<br>"Why do bats need entertainment?"  
>"Stop asking questions," said Vikus.<br>"But- But- fine. But who is that?"  
>Sickus sighed. "That is my wife, Salmonet."<br>"Yo," she said.  
>"Hi," Trevor said back. Suddenly, a thought hit him. "How did you get down here?"<br>"Normally I would tell you to stop asking questions, but now I have to answer you in the form of a long, boring story that will probably make you fall asleep because it's necessary to the plot. It all began in sixteen thirty-three..."  
>"Wait a minute! Let me get this straight, It's been six chapters and they're only just now explaining the plot? Did J. J. Abrams write this book or something?"<br>"Stop asking questions."  
>"Actually," said Salmonet, "The story would probably go better with dinner." they all sat down at a table that was in a dining room next to the High Hall. They just sat there for a while, when Lucy came into the room, with a ballerina's outfit on. Walking beside her was another boy that actually looked normal. He was about sixteen.<br>He walked over to Trevor and said, "Don't eat the fish."  
>"Why? Did somebody poison it?"<br>"No, it's just that Lucy cooked it."  
>"Oh."<br>"Hey!" said Lucy. Then she sighed. "This is my third cousin twice removed, Bill." Trevor was surprised to hear such a normal name in an underground city full of cavemen gangsters. Then the bats arrived. Trevor recognized the yellow one as Lucy's bat from the arena. Another bat flew in, and Trevor thought this one was Bill's, until it went and sat down next to Sickus. And when it sat down, it sat down in one of the chairs. _That shouldn't even be possible! _thought Trevor.  
>"This is Snow White," said Sickus, pointing to Lucy's bat, "and this is Archelaus," he said, pointing to the bat sitting down next to him, who was a sickly green matching the name of his owner.<br>"They ae bonded to us," said Lucy.  
>"What does that mean?"<br>"Stop asking questions," said Marrieth, Lucy, and Sickus at the same time.  
>"Do you bond with Dung Beetles?"<br>"What did I just tell you," said Sickus.  
>"What do you do when you're bonded?"<br>"Ask one more question and I will be forced to tell your mother, boy!"  
>"Okay, I'm good." There was a long pause, and then the food got arrived. Trevor looked around for the fish Bill had mentioned, but couldn't find it. He could, on the other hand, find a plate of monkey brains. Trevor looked around at the other food. He didn't like where this was going. They had stuffed peppers, vegetable lasagnae, jumbalaya, raw eggs, and a great number of unidentifiable substances.<br>"Where did this come from?" Trevor asked, expecting a reprimand for asking questions. Instead, Salmonet answered him.  
>"They were on sale, boy. Now hush up and eat." That night didn't end well for Trevor's bowels. Then again, all this food made Trevor think of the scientific specimens in a laboratory, and that made him think of his dad, who was a scientist. He disagreed with E.T., although he <em>did <em>agree with GLaDOS and her scientific ways. Suddenly, Trevor realized something. He hadn't heard how they had gotten down here! He didn't care, of course, but he knew that he must make a sacrifice for the sake of the plot!  
>"So, you were going to tell me how you got down here?" Everyone else (except Sickus) looked at him as if he were crazy.<br>"Ah, yes, well it all began in sixteen thirty-three..." and Sickus proceeded to tell a long and boring tale about a guy named Hamburger that I am not going to let you hear, even though Trevor went through all that trouble to get him to tell it, ending with a quote from some random guy named Fred Clark.  
>"What happened to him?" Trevor asked,wincing.<br>"He died," said Salmonet casually.  
>"He said it was a lack of moonlight. Then he mumbled something about wearing wolves. He must have been crazy." Trevor thought about this. He wondered if the moon was out where he lived. He wondered if the house had flooded yet because of the kitchen sink he had left on or if his mother had noticed it yet. And suddenly, he knew something. He didn't know why he was just now realizing this when he had already been planning his escape, but he knew he had to get out of there.<p>

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><p><strong>And that is my sixth chapter! It is by far the longest and funniest chapter I have written, so I hope you enjoyed it! I heave to be quick with this, as I have to be typing a chapter in my other story, which I think you should check out. It's called The Machine: Prologue, and it's on FictionPress.<strong>

**Boom.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Wow... I can't believe I've made it this far... I've actually got supporters, and I haven't bailed for a whole seven chapters! I feel... UNSTOPPABLE! And before this unstopability goes away, I think I should get started.**

**DISCLAIMER: NOT EVEN DISCLAIMERS CAN STOP ME! MWAHAHAHAHAHA! *guy in suit with earpiece walks up and tasers me* AAAAHHHHHH!  
>I *cough* own nothing. *cough cough*<strong>

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><p>Chapter 7<br>_

It was dark. Actually, it was _extremely _dark. The dark seemed to apply physical pressure to his eyes. Oh, wait, that was his stomach. Trevor still couldn't figure out how it did that. His eyes weren't even open yet. Until he opened them. But it was still dark. Trevor was deathley afraid of the dark. _Dark, dark, it's dark, it's very dark, gotta get out of the dark, dark, dark, darkness, dark, dark everywhere, it's so dark, always dark, forever dark, it's dark, dark, DARK, lemons, DAARRKK, DAAAAAAAAARRRRRRKKK! _Trevor rolled over and plugged in his nightlight again. _Better._ He felt High-Heels press into his pillow-like stomach. He didn't even notice she had gotten into the bed with him. High-Heels was good at that. One time she had crawled into his stomach and gotten lost for three days, and nobody had noticed until she crawled out at the dinner table that night. Before bed, Trevor and High-Heels took a bath, which he didn't turn down, because it let him examine the water source. for the tub. Trevor had stuck his head underwater to look around for a conveniently placed water source and came back up screaming with his eyes red, and he suddenly knew that the dirty water from the bathtub was emptied out into the Waterway and that that the Waterway conveniently had two entrances to the Overland. Life just works like that sometimes. Now Trevor was lying in the bed, with darkness (_DAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRKKK!_) everywhere, and High-Heels pressed up against his stomach, waiting for the perfect oppertunity to-  
>"It's time to escape!" said Trevor, hearing no noise through the soundproof curtains. He put High-Heels in the baby carrier, grabbed his Hello Kitty flashlight and his Dora the Explorer backpack, and set off. The Underlanders did not post guards outside his room, and there were lamps outside providing dim light.<br>"You step on me foot!" exclaimed High-Heels.  
>"But you're in the baby carrier!"<br>"So. Maybe I hovered out of it."  
>"I've been trying to tell mom that you're possessed." Trevor wondered how to get to the river. He pulled out his iPhone.<br>"Siri, how do you get to the river?"  
>"Take the next right, then duck out of sight, for the Underland guards won't let you get very far." Trevor's Siri had been cursed to forever rhyme. He followed her directions until the sound of the water grew very large. Trevor squeezed through the eighth door in the past half hour (his sides were beginning to hurt), and found the river. Except it wasn't a river. It was a suicide river. You know, the kind of river that white water rafters like to use. ("Hey, let's go back and hit that rock again, I've still got some cartilage on my left knee!") Speaking of which, guess what kind of boats they had tied up to the dock? Rubber rafts. They even had canoe paddles in them. The river itself was carrying boulders along as if they weren't even there! Of course, if Trevor fell in, it would probably have a lot harder time with him him. Trevor climbed in and the raft emmediatly took off, guided by Siri to the nearest rat-inhabited beach cave. Unfortunately though, it seemed that the Underlanders noticed his absence (It was hard not to. It's like being in a crowded elevator, but then stepping out.) and were tailing him in a boat. It even had the jolly roger flag on it. Now the Underlanders were acting like hippie pirate cavemen.<br>Trevor heard them say things like, "AARRRGH! Hoist the sails, yo!"  
>"Aargh! What are sails, brother?"<br>"Aargh! I don't know, dude. If you talk out of line again, you'll walk the plank, punk!"  
>They were easily catching up, but then Siri said, "You have reached your destination, so don't take any hesitation for some mindless coontemplation on why blue whales eat plankton." Trevor jumped out with his flashlight and turned around. He was on a beach with a cave, but unfortunately, there was no rat.<br>"Siri, now the story's going to be all messed up!"  
>"I will not be very sorry if I'm not invited to your next party," she said. Trevor walked into something big and hairy and fell backwards.<br>"AAAAAHHHHH! MOLDY ROCK! Oh no wait, it must be a rat."  
>Then a voice next to the rock said, "No, <em>I'm <em>the rat. That is a moldy rock."  
>"AAAAAHHHH! RAT <em>AND<em> MOLDY ROCK!" Trevor screamed.

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><p><strong>There *gasp* you have it *gasp*. It took *gasp* so long *gasp*! Done gasping! I would haave to say that, although it was such a lazy one, I think that was the best chapter I've done. And that kind of scares me. Well, since ProProsocutorI.M.E told me to, I'm going to advertise a story! It was written by me and him, and it's on FictionPress. It's called "The Machine: Prologue", and it's something I really was thinking about for a LONG time, and it's going to be a series (I hope) that intercrosses between FictionPress and FanFiction. It's almost done! I really want people to read this, so give it a look if you liked this!<strong>

**Boom.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I am happy at the moment, because I just got another person to thank! YAY! Thank you to Sintobin for your review AND for putting me on Author Alert and Story Alert! This makes me happy! Happy happy joy joy, happy happy joy! By the way, the rat distraction scene with the dancing was the scene that inspired this whole parody. I was reading _Gregor the Overlander_ one day and I was on that part when my train of thought went off track to _what would happen if..._ and I dreamed up the entire scene. Then on another day, after my second failed story attempt while I was thinking of something else to right, when that scene popped into my head, And I came up with the idea for a TUC parody. And it was successful! I certainly am a weird human being aren't I? *eye twitch* And on we go!**

**DISCLAIMER: Gregor? Who is Gregor? No, I only own _Trevor_. Yes, wrong number, it happens to everyone, bye.**

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><p>Chapter 8<br>_

"LINNER!" called the rat, and another rat materialized next to it. No, I mean it _literally _materialized there on the spot.  
>Trevor didn't seem to notice this and asked, "Linner?"<br>"Yes, linner," said the other rat, "can't you tell it's about mid-afternoon?" Everybody stared at him. Even Siri.  
>"What, am I the only rat here with x-ray vision?"<br>Trevor heard a giant cricket chirping. Off in the distance, a voice said "Mid-afternoon? My appointment!"  
>"He fell in an acid puddle as a child," explained the first rat, "but anyways, it's time for linner!" He was <em>very <em>cheerful.  
>"I call dibs on the fat one, and you can have the smelly appetizer," said the second.<br>"I pooped again," said High-Heels.  
>"High-Heels!" said Trevor, sniffing the air.<br>"Hey, give me a break, I'm, like, five, okay? It's not my fault that I'm not fully potty-trained," and she then started grumbling to herself about cookies being bettter rewards then stickers for using the toilet.  
>"Can we get on with it?" said the first rat.<br>"Wait!" stalled Trevor, "Don't you want dinner with a show? Where's your _class_?"  
>"Well, it's technically linner, but okay," said rat number two. Trevor didn't wait for the other rat's response as he ran up the steps of a conveniently placed stage next to the cave as the rats sat down at a table in front of the stage waited. High-Heels came to their table as a waiter and gave them both menus.<br>"May I take your order?" she asked.  
>As there was only one main course, one appetizer, and wine on the menu, the rats chose almost instantly. "Yes, I'll have the Trevor For Five, we'll be needing some leftovers for the next two months, and she can have the appetizer," said rat number two, pointing at rat number one near the end of the sentence. <em>So, <em>thought Trevor, _rat number one's a girl... Interesting... But not really...  
><em>"Sorry," said High-Heels, "we're all out of the appetizer, but I can get you some Trevor For Five right up!" _I'll get you for that, _thought Trevor. The rats then noticed something.  
>"Hey, where's the entertainment?" said girl rat. And since I am now calling rat number one girl rat, that officially makes rat number two rat number one. Rat number one is very proud of himself. Then a tomatoe hit Trevor's face and he started tap dancing... Sort of. Or at least as close to tap dancing as you can get when you broke through the stage floor on your <em>previous <em>attempt at tap-dancing. As more tomatoes hit Trevor's face he realized that giant rats have a really good aim. He also realized that he needed to find a new act, so he just took Siri out of his pocket and placed her on a chair.  
>"Siri, start talking"<br>"I will not talk unless you take me for a walk," she stated flatly. Rat number tw- rat number _one_ suddenly started laughing and milk squi-  
>"Wait, where did that milk come from?" asked Trevor. Stop interrupting my narrating!<br>"Sorry," said Trevor. Anyways, both the rats were laughing hysterically, and Trevor turned back to Siri, saying "Siri, keep it up!"  
>"I said 'no', so you will go." Unfortunately, Siri was apparently a "one-time-use-only" on giant rats.<br>"Boring," said girl rat.  
>"I think our dinner's ready!" said rat number one, and then they both advanced on Trevor. Rat number one suddenly dematerialized and then materialized three feet to the right as a bat flew and knocked over girl rat. Trevor turned around and noticed four other bats that he hadn't noticed before. He saw Lucy on one of the bats and waved hi. She smiled and waved back. Then he noticed the rest of the Underlanders, who were being attacked by two giant rats, one of which had mutated powers. Weird. Bill leaned over his bat and shouted, "Run, Trevor... Er, waddle, Trevor!"<br>"Hey! That's insu-" CUTTING TREVOR OFF! How do you like it when I cut off _your _dialougue, Trevor? Huh? Huh? Anyways, Trevor was backed against the wall, so he wouldn't have been able to _waddle_ anywhere anyways.  
>"Heeeyyyy..." said Trevor. You know, I'm the narrator, so I have the power to the erase you from the story alltogether. Be lucky you're the most important to the plot. So, Trevor was watching the rats and the humans fight. At one point rat number one jumped to Perdisco's bat and ripped off it's ear by touching it, making the bat fall to the ground. As the rat opened it's mouth, showing two forked, acid-green tongues, Trevor suddenly leapt forward and stuck the flashlight in rat number one's face. BLINDED BY THE LIGHT! rat number one dematerialized again and then materialized a foot backwards- right onto Bill's sword.<br>"Oh, pickles," the rat said as suddenly, rat number one poofed into a cloud of pickle-scented smoke, and with him, Bill's sword. So now Perdisco was unconsious as well her bat, Marrieth's bat was flying in circles randomly, Bill was unarmed, and the girl rat was crazy and also going in circles. Oh, no, that wasn't supposed to happen!  
>"What?" asked Trevor. Well, the girl rat was supposed to attack you, but now that she's gone crazy... Trevor, maybe if you stand in her way then she'll attack you!<br>"What! No! I'm not doing that!" Erasing Trevor in three, two...  
>"OKAY!" yelled Trevor as he ran towards the circling rat. Sure enough, as soon as the girl rat saw Trevor, it started after him, but before it could even get a half a foot, it stopped, gagging.<br>"KUMQUATS!" yelled the girl rat before poofing into another cloud of dust, this one smelling like kumquats. She took the sword that had been in her throat with her, and behind the cloud was Lucy, whom Trevor had completely forgotten, upside down on her bat, and looking kind of green. Before Trevor could sit, though, (and possibly cause an earthquake doing it) Bill ran up tried to hoist Trevor onto his bat, immediately regretting doing so as he broke all of his fingers.  
>"You know, I think you're really taking this whole fat thing <em>way <em>too far. You've made more fat about me than GLaDOS has made about Chell!" Trevor said. Exactly! My life's goal is almost complete!  
>"Your life's goal is to insult me about being fat?" Yes. Fatty. Problem? Trevor chose to ignore this and climbed onto Bill's bat himself, while Bill, seeing his bat's intense pain decided to ride on Lucy's bat. Lucy dumped a bucket of lantern oil onto the cave beach and then jumped onto her bat and took off. Bill's bat did too, but a bit slower.<br>When it got into the air, Bill said "Drop the torch!" and Trevor did. As Bill's bat flew off, Trevor watched beach burn ablaze.

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><p><strong>WHEW! I am very sorry for the long wait, I'm not sure why the waits between the chapters are getting so long, ESPECIALLY in the summer break! AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH! I think I'm going to slam my head on the key board in frustration. One moment please. eyrkudadulra;'jbvai"WEag[<strong>**i5or-0ka'340]'[hjpaes/rkot'-05ke.9g'i3409j[a04'-0kg09jdsfns['49iga3sjewrkjag-tk4i0er[0gfia[-4i]. All better!**

**Boom.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Whhhhhhheeeeeeeeee! Aaaaaawwwwww... The ride's over. :( Oh well, I guess I'll just have to type my chapter now. Pooh. Now, I have decided that since I don't seem to be getting many reviews, and I _know _that there are a lot of people that view this story, then how about for every review you give me, I will review one of your stories! Yay!**

**Boom.**

**DISCLAIMER: Luke, you can't sue mmeeeeee... because I AM YOUR FATHER! Oh, and I don't own anything, too, so now you can't sue me even more!**

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><p>Chapter 9<br>_

Trevor was clutching his bat for dear life, of course making it harder for the bat to fly, but Trevor din't notice this... Yet. But eventually Trevor's fear of the rats (that were dead) turned into a fear of being very high in the air over a carnivorous-fish-infested river on a giant bat that was struggling under his weight. Then Trevor realized that he needed to think of a way to blame the Underlanders for what happened, and settled for the fact that they had been holding him hostage and hadn't warned him about the giant rats. Then he remembered that the Dung Beetles were going to _sell _him to the rats. _No_ _wonder they eat dung,_ Trevor thought.  
>About halfway there (Although Trevor didn't know how far away they were) Trevor's torch blew out, and it was the last one. Trevor knew that the bats could use echolocation, but he didn't realize that he was choking his bat so much that it couldn't use it's echolocation, and they almost crashed into a wall before Trevor realized what he was doing and loosened his grip just in time for the bat to- Oh, wait, they <em>did <em>crash. But fortunately, the wall they crashed into was right above the beach where Trevor had left. He remembered when he had took off in the boat, and then suddenly realized he had forgotten his iPhone on the rat beach. _Siri! _Trevor thought. And then, remembering that there were no sad scenes in a parody, forgot instantly about her.  
>"Wait a second!" Trevor interjected, "I can't just forget about Siri! I got her for my birthday!" Well, too bad. I'm the narrator, I can do whatever I want. Now, as I was saying, <em>Trevor instantly forgot about Siri<em>. And he did. A group of non-ganster Underlanders were waiting by the side of the palace, in front of the door Trevor had left from earlier. Trevor had put together by now that all of the most important Underlanders were all of the non-gangsters.  
>"Get up, punk!" Trevor got up and turned around to see Marrieth glaring at him in a very gangster-like way indeed. Trevor tried to get up, but his legs were too weak to hold his massive weight this time, so Marrieth (to his disgust) had to help him up, and even then it was hard for the both of them. Once Trevor was up, though, his legs sort of locked in place, so when Marrieth handcuffed him and another non-ganster guard started prodding Trevor towards the door, then he had to walk like a robot until he reached his destination, which was a small room in the shape of diagonal square.<br>_ You know it's a diamond, right? _Trevor thought. Shut up. Trevor sat in a chair, and he saw the guards strangely set themselves up in the formation of bowling pins, but before Trevor could make a move toward them, unfortunately, Marrieth tied him to his chair. _I'm that dangerous? _Trevor thought. _I'm Super-Trevor or something! Or, better yet, I'M A MAGE! _BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA! YOU! Don't make me laugh! Sorry, sorry, I just couldn't help that! It's just- _you! _I'm sorry, I'm sorry, just continue. Anyways, Trevor falls asleep and wakes up in his own bed.  
>"REALLY?" Trevor shouted. Nope. April fools!<br>"Dangit." Just then the guards parted to let in Lucy, who walked acrost the room and slapped him.  
>"Whoa, man," said High-Heels, "Hitting calls for a time-out, you know." And apparantly it did.<br>"Lucy!" said Sickus, walking into the room. "Time-out! You know Underlanders don't hit!"  
>"But Sickus, he made me have to smell pickles! You know I hate pickles!"<br>"Well then, I take it the rats are dead," said Sickus calmly, because being the only smart one in the books (except for the semi-supernatural High-Heels), he knew that since this was a children's book, that Trevor was going to live, so Sickus could make him go on that dangerous, plot-important, long, kind of pointless quest that he held in the back room in case of boring plot emergencies. You know, if he ever needed to.  
>"And you also get no dessert tonight for going out without permission." <em>So, she wasn't supposed to be there either, <em>thought Trevor. _But then again, she did save my life. _Trevor really didn't care though, because he knew that if she hadn't, she would have been wiped out by the kind narrator who would only have been doing his job. Hint hint.  
>"You know, you have to stop that," said Trevor. "You've only got, like, three shards of the Forth Wall left to shatter, and then someone else will have to replace you as narrator." Really? S<em>hatter. <em>Oops. _Shatter. _So, Trevor- S_hatter. _WAIT, WHA- And then the narrator was replaced by ME! That's right, BLURPENSKIRF. boom himself is now narrating this story! And I promise not to interrupt you or make fun of your fatness like the old narrator.  
>"YAY!" screamed Trevor. On with the story!<br>"So," said Sickus, "Did he even fight?"  
>"Bill says he did," said Lucy. "Without a weapon, though."<br>"Then he was couragous,"  
>"But don't you tell me every day that being couragous without a weapon is like being smart without a brain?"<br>"Shut up. He is still better than you." Sickus then turned to the guards and commanded them to cut ropes on Trevor's wrists.  
>"NOW, SIT AT THE TABLE, YOU LOW-LIFE DOGS! WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A TALK!" shouted Sickus, pounding his fist on the table. Neither Trevor or Lucy moved.<br>"Can we please have a discussion?" he then asked quietly. Trevor and Lucy, both looking intimidated, sat down at the table on opposite sides from each other, and waited for Sickus to talk.  
>"Now, Trevor," he began, "I know you're probably coming up with a way to blame us for the fight, but in short, it was your fault, and Lucy only hit you because the deaths tonight brings back memories of her parents' deaths. And you made her smell pickles."<br>"Sickus!" Lucy said. "That was a secret!"  
>"I had my fingers crossed," Sickus said. Lucy gasped. "but I think Trevor has a right to know, because I know that he lost his father as well." Now Trevor gasped.<br>"How did you know?"  
>"Recognize this?" Sickus tossed Trevor a keychain that had a Hello Kitty sculpture on it. Trevor had made the Hello Kitty sculpture, and then put it on the keychain. His father never went anywhere without that Hello Kitty sculpture.<p>

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><p><strong>All done! There we go, that's two chapters in a row, so I think I'm good there! And since I'm the author of this story, I have unlimited Forth Walls, so I'm the narrator to stay! And I also want to remind you of my other story on , entitled THE MACHINE: PROLOUGUE.<strong>

**Boom.**


End file.
